50 Shades of Complicated

I once heard someone say that love is the easiest thing in the world. That we think it’s easy to hate and it becomes our default setting but really what’s easy is to love, because to hate takes energy but to love gives vibes. I wish it were that simple. And I wish it were just about the “feeling” or the “energy” or the “vibes” of it all. I wish it were easier to love people when they hurt us. Or that it were easy to love people back to happiness when we’ve hurt them. I wish I knew how to accept the grey parts between love and something else. And I wish I knew what that something else was. But mostly, I wish that I could accept that love is not simple, but multifaceted. That it’s not black or white, I love you or I don’t, but grey and sometimes in between. Because right now I’m feeling like I don’t want any more shades of grey. And love should be simple but in a world like ours it seems to be 50 shades of complicated.

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